Wednesday, July 25, 2007

Gorilla Zoe





Gorrilla Zoe
Hood N(F)igga










This song has been playin on the radio constantly. I don't listen to that payola driven bullshit but errtime I change CDs this niggas voice assaults me.

There was something sooo familiar about his voice...

It took me awhile but I got it!

He sound just like Tone Loc!

Remember the Funky Cold Medina?

I don't either.... but he was in BeBe's Kids and every black child alive in the early 90s remembers that movie.

Well Gorilla Zoe, who pronounces his moniker Zo, I guess the E is silent.

His mother was a very insensitive woman.

But all those years of school yard ridicule made him into what he is today. A Hood Nigga with a mean mug only to be rivaled by 50.






The video kicks off with Zoě in a old school drop top pulling up to some Breezys house. He draws the ladies in with pure animal magnetism.

Plus his speakers so loud they can't focus on his ugly ass.

Seriously Zoë looks like Timbaland's long lost brother.

Oh my bad that was a typo

He looks like Timbaland's, pit bull's, long lost brother.

Sorry bout that

This is your everyday "I'm Hood" video so of course they have the quintessential slabs, women of ill repute, and low quality jewelry.

Wait,Wait,Wait!

There's a twist!

He transforms ordinary niggas into extraordinary "Hood Niggas" like himself.
Say you're playing basketball but you just can't make a three.
Zoë will loan you his, hood...ness and transform you into a ugly fat nigga who still can't make the basket.

Thanks Gorilla Zoè!!

Another Odd thing I noticed was when ZoÊ was listing all the "bad bitches" he keeps enslaved. The editor was way off with the girls, look closely the white girl is supposed to be red or brown. Shit I couldn't follow it myself but I know the shit was off.

I mean maybe I'm just being too critical but these videos cost hundreds of thousands and they still fuckin up? Niggas need to go back to DeVry forreal.

Young Joc of "Its Goin Down" fame makes a cameo. Looking mighty dapper with his etch-a-sketch fade and flashing his ugly ass chain. Man even Ghostface laughin at this Nigga! and he wears a bathrobe and a golden eagle bracelet to formal events!




You know how many young children died in Sierra Leone to get him that gaudy piece of fecal matter?

None

That shit is straight Cubic Zirconium!

Its iight Joc we know Puff requires 80% and the use of your asshole over at Bad Boy.

Times is hard

This video sucked and the song is even worse look on the bright side Zoé. You're signed to Bad Boy for life........

Nevermind you prolly better off pulling a *Houston

6 comments:

Anonymous said...

WOW, Classic post. The Ghostface line put me under. And the different type of "e" on every other Zoe was nice touch.

*Future* said...

Hah I didn't think anybody would catch that imma add the video and some pics later

Anonymous said...

The song is actually straight...the video is another story though

Anonymous said...

ok ok Young man, i aint gona front the puff video recap had me in tears. I had to stifle my laughs here on the job.

"sing Kim back into submission?" LMAO

Thats the funniest shit ive heard all day.

*Future* said...

50- I get Money today

The Game Fan said...

I'm so sorry, but I couldn't even watch that whole video. I already chopped up an onion today and my eyes can't take no more.

Future I'ma need you not to hate on my boy Tone Loc by comparing him to this this...I don't know what to call him

Gems of the day:

Say you're playing basketball but you just can't make a three.
Zoë will loan you his, hood...ness and transform you into a ugly fat nigga who still can't make the basket.


You know how many young children died in Sierra Leone to get him that gaudy piece of fecal matter?

None

That shit is straight Cubic Zirconium!